Engaged for 22 Days- What We've Done So Far!
We got engaged on December 29th, 2019 and have already done so much wedding planning that I have received SO MANY messages on my Instagram commenting on “how much we’ve already one” and “how calm I seem to be” while planning a wedding. So much so, that I really wanted to touch on that!
YES, I have stressed out a little. But only when we were touring venues and comparing all the costs. Mack and I were given a lump some of money from my parents and they told us we could use that for a wedding or a down payment on a house. So naturally, Mack and I are trying to keep this wedding as cheap as possible- our ultimate goal is under 10k. If you’ve planned a wedding before- you know that’s near impossible.
But we are trying our BEST and so far, we have done REALLY good. I wanted to be candid throughout this entire process and not try to hide the costs involved because I think everyone does that, and I don’t see how that helps anyone. I went into wedding planning extremely naive, like I believe most people feel. I see wedding planning as a challenge. How much money can we save while still having the party and wedding of our dreams?!
Anyways, I enjoyed being engaged for all of 12 hours before I was looking at venues. I know a lot of people will say “enjoy being engaged before you start planning!” but I enjoy being engaged every day and I know myself- if I didn’t have anything else planned out, I wouldn’t be able to just sit around. So, I reached out to and we (Mack, my mom and I) toured 4 venues in one weekend- the first weekend we were engaged. That was the only weekend I really felt stressed, because I didn’t LOVE any of them on Saturday, and only liked one on Sunday. spoiler alert- the one we loved Sunday is the one we signed a contract with :)
Venue: Throughout the next week, I could not get any time off work to go tour places, and Mack was so amazing. He went to tour 4 venues that week alone and sent me videos so I could see them too. We later set a hard deadline and said okay, we have considered 12 venues all around the Charlotte area- we need to make a decision on Friday, 1/10. So we did! The answer was very obvious based on cost and how we felt at the venue we looked at Sunday. We signed the contract on January 15th, 2020 and had an awesome beer with the guy who took our money, and felt so at peace the entire time. We made a good decision :)
MONEY SAVING TIP: we texted the guy who owns our venue and asked if we paid in cash in full, could we get a discount and he gave us a cute 5% off, but that paid for our save the dates and custom return labels! Anything here and there helps!
Website/registry: I made our website through Zola on December 31st, 2019. I compared all the different wedding website and planning tools like The Knot, Zola, and a bunch of others, and overall liked the ease of planning and navigating the tools on the website better on Zola, so we chose them and so far I LOVE it! I want to plug our website here but I want to wait until our Save the dates are out for friends and family to view first!
As far as the registry- apparently it’s taboo to only ask for money but Mack and I really don’t care. I’m sure we will get gifts which is great, but all we want is money to keep separate and use for a house. We are aiming for a deposit of at least 10-15% when we buy a house, so that’s the only thing we need. We’ve been living together for 2 years now and have EVERYTHING you can think of as far as linens and kitchen items, and we don’t want sheets and all that because we plan on upgrading to a king size bed when we buy our home anyways! There’s LITERALLY nothing we want or need as far as typical wedding gifts go, so we are only asking for a “home fund” and a “honeymoon fund”. Guests can donate as soon as they see our website, and Zola takes no other fees from a person’s donation except the typical percentage for any online credit card fee (2.5%) which our guests can choose to pay for themselves or have it taken out of the total amount they wish to give.
Save the dates: We picked out save the dates based on cost alone. I looked at EVERY website I could find that did invitations and save the dates, and ultimately decided on VistaPrint because they were the cheapest BY A LANDSLIDE. And we loved them!! We got to add our photo to the back of the save the dates and the theme matches our wedding perfectly. If you wish, Zola has themed invites and save the dates to match the website theme you choose, but we wanted to keep the extra $100 we would have spent on Zola’s products and decided to go with VistaPrint! We ordered 150 save the dates, envelopes, and 420 custom return labels AND paid for the shipping, and it was still only $157 total. They also gave us a 10$ off coupon to use through February in our order, so we plan on ordering formal invitations mid February and using that coupon!
MONEY SAVING TIP: we could have added gold foil to parts of the save the dates to make it look prettier, but that was an extra $1 per save the date. I know only a select few people will actually keep them, but most people throw them away and to spend an extra $150 just to have some gold foil stamped on the paper was not worth it to us.
The dress: YES, I have already said “yes to the dress”! And it is my DREAM dress. I made appointments to two places in my hometown a few days after being engaged, and made the appointments for January 11th, 2020. It was me, my mom, my aunt, Mack’s mom, and Mack’s aunt who all came to see me try on dresses and it was one of the most special days yet. I went to the first place called Classic Bride and Formals thinking I wouldn’t find anything, and ended up laying my eyes on my dress and immediately picking it out. We tried on at least 12 dresses there and then went to our next appointment at Anjolique bridal, where I actually yawned the entire time because nothing compared to how I felt at Classic Bride. So, we all headed to a late lunch and I immediately called Classic Bride to buy that dress because she had already taken my measurements “just in case”. I ordered the dress and a veil that I tried on as well, and she gave us a small 10% discount just because we bought on the same day.
About that budget- I only allowed $1,500 for a dress. I went in telling my mom DO NOT LET ME TRY ON ANYTHING OVER THAT because I cannot imagine spending any more than that on a dress for one night- I can’t even imagine spending that amount! Well, of course this dress was double my budget and its the first one I tried on, and the only one that actually made me tear up. That’s how I knew. It’s the dress that I have always envisioned myself in on this day, and everyone who was there knew it too. But, I had a runner up that was right in my budget and GORGEOUS, and I was going to choose that one. While we were at lunch, Mack’s mom was sweet enough to mention that her and Mack’s dad were already planning on paying for our bar service for the wedding, which gave me more than enough room in our budget for the dress, AND my parents decided to give a little extra just to allow me to have my dream. I am SO blessed for the people in my life and I know it’s “just a dress” but now it will always feel like I was able to wear my absolute dream dress because of the sacrifices made by those who love me most. It’s so much more than a dress now, and I CAN’T WAIT to do my first fitting in June!
Bridesmaid proposals: I already ordered everything for my boxes, but I am still waiting on them to show up and to send out the proposals for my favorite girls to stand by me! Don’t want to spoil the surprise for anyone until after I have all my “yeses”!
Engagement photos: On January 12, 2020, Mack and I had our engagement photos done! How much did we spend? 0$. Mack is into photography as a hobby, so he already has the nicest camera we could get our hands on, and my dad majored in art and photography in college. We made it a family outing and had my mom help us recreate poses we loved on Pinterest, and my dad captured everything. We ended up having a super fun day and it was so special for my family that they got to take those photos of us. Overall we saved hundreds, and we got the photos immediately.
White dresses/wedding shoes: I went to the mall with Mack on a Thursday night, and we shopped for 2 hours. I picked out 3 white dresses AND my wedding shoes, and spent under $300. I chose a white maxi dress for engagement photos and our rehearsal dinner, a white body con dress for my bachelorette party, and another white shift dress for any other bridal events we may have. I plan on wearing my wedding shoes to all of these events as well. My dresses were $10, $30, and $55. The shoes were an accident- we were walking around Nordstrom and I saw them and decided they were PERFECT and I am so in love with them! Funny story- they were the store display shoes and the sticker price on them was half rubbed off, so I saw “$57”. Then we checked out, and they were “$157”. But, still an incredible deal because they are SO comfortable, and perfect to wear for all the wedding events, and then be a display heel in a bookcase one day because they are so pretty!
MONEY SAVING TIP: If you have the chance, do all your white dress shopping in January or February because everything from last season is on MAJOR sale!
What’s left: We need a DJ, to choose our catering (which we already chose, we just need to do the tasting and choose a menu), send our invitations, and handle florals, and so much more. My mom and I are looking to do all the florals ourselves and I am so excited to craft that with her. I am blessed enough to have a grandmother and an aunt who want to make my wedding cake (I’m asking my aunt to since she makes wedding and event cakes for a living), and that Mack’s parents are so kind to contribute to our big day by buying the bar service.
